Sunday, April 4, 2010
When She Needs a Break
It's difficult when the woman you love tells you that she isn't sure she wants to continue her relationship with you. Many women say they need to take a break because they just want to break up. She may have been thinking about things for a while now, but hasn't figured out a way to approach you to resolve them. On the other hand, she may not be entirely sure of what she wants to do.
If your girlfriend has asked that the two of you take a break from your relationship, it probably came from out of nowhere. Sometimes when a woman asks for a break it's because she wants to date other guys or she may have already been seeing another man and has been cheating on you behind your back.
There's also the possibility that she's bored, feels neglected or is just unhappy with the way you've been treating her. Getting to the point where she actually tells you what's wrong isn't always easy, which is why you need to be very careful with how you handle the situation when your girlfriend wants a break.
The fact that your girlfriend wants a break and not a complete breakup right off the bat means that she still values your relationship to some degree. Begging, pleading, or invading her space trying to talk her out of her decision is absolutely the wrong thing to do and will drive her away even faster. You can get her back by showing her that you respect what she wants. The key to getting her back is to stay strong. If you love her, give her exactly what she wants and show her that you respect what she wants, no matter how hard it may be for you.
Let her have the time and space she needs and don't give her a reason to completely cut ties with you. As hard as it may be, avoid calling, emailing and texting her completely. By you not initiating any contact for a while, your girlfriend will start to miss you and she'll be the one calling you. Even if your girlfriend has given you the thumbs up to see other people, don’t sleep with any other women until you are sure the relationship is completely over. Making the wrong moves while your relationship is already in jeopardy could cost you any chance of reconciliation.
When she is ready to contact you, let her know that you're willing to listen to her and allow her to open up and reveal to you exactly why she wanted the separation in the first place. If she repeatedly gives you random, unimportant complaints or no answer at all, realize that these are all signs she wants to break up with you altogether and leave the situation with your dignity intact. However, if she gives you an honest, direct answer about the relationship, perhaps you can fix it and save the relationship. Try to agree to make a pact to work through any problems rather than take a break.
By making a genuine effort to fix the problems that drove her away, you can not only stop the break up from happening--you can actually strengthen the future of your relationship together.