Saturday, January 30, 2010

5 Signs She's Single

There is no one giveaway to whether or not a woman is single, especially when even some married women flirt with guys. So if you don't want to come right out and ask if she's romantically involved or not, here are 5 hints to help you determine if she's available:

1. Look at her ring finger on the left hand

The first and obvious clue is to check for an engagement or wedding band. If there is a band, a ring of any kind or a tan line where a ring usually is, she's more than likely not available. If there is no ring or tan lines on that particular finger, then you can be pretty sure she's not married; however, she may be dating someone.

2. She talks to different guys

If you observe her talking to many guys, it may mean that she's single, open to conversation and open to romantic possibilities.

She looks at other couples with envy and sadness
If you're observing her from afar and you notice her looking at other couples with envy and/or sadness, she probably doesn't have a man to come home to. That's where you come in.

4. She's overly talkative with you

Women who are taken tend to be less friendly with other men and give off a more standoffish attitude when approached. If you start talking to a woman and she does things like making intense eye contact with you, touches your arm or leg subtly and tells you in one conversation that she has a dog named Chip, likes to cook and goes to the yoga classes every week, chances are that she's single.

5. She's always out with her girlfriends

Unavailable women still go out and have fun with their girlfriends, but they still make time for the men in their lives. If you see the same woman out with her friends all the time at the same bar, chances are she's single.

Thursday, January 28, 2010

How to Get Women To Notice You

how to make women want youGetting a woman's attention is not that difficult, but maintaining that attention can be hard. Women have it easy when it comes to getting attention. All a woman has to do is walk out the door and she can get more than enough attention from men, wherever she goes. In order to get that same attention from women, the most important thing you can do is to continually improve yourself.

Knowing how to get women to notice you is something that most guys are never taught; however, there are some simple techniques you can use to get female attention. To make yourself more attractive to women, you want to display confidence and security in yourself wherever you go. If you carry yourself like you don't deserve attention from women--you are not going to get it.

When you always appear to be in a negative and defensive mode, a woman will assume that you are not open to her and will avoid you without even getting to know you. Work on making your posture and your body language open so that you do seem to be approachable. After all, you don't want to intimidate a woman--you want her to come to you!

Women are very keen to noticing a man's eyes. If your eyes seem friendly and have that ability to "talk" to women, then you will see that they will approach you and start to notice you more often. In case you don't know what to talk about, it's always good to ask her questions and than make a conversation out of it.

Women are very tuned into speech, and they respond to a man who can effectively use words to draw them in. It shows a man of careful thought and one who won't be careless with his woman. Find something unique about her, make her feel good and then steer the conversation toward her interests. When she talks to you, make eye contact and lean forward. Women find men who are interested in what she's saying very attractive.

It's OK to be a nice guy, but keep in mind that being too friendly with women can instantly put you into their friend category, and once your stuck in the FRIENDZONE, they will never pay much attention towards you romantically again. You don't have to be a jerk, but keep an attitude as if you are not trying or maybe you simply don't need to impress her. Let her impress you and make her feel as if she would have to try harder to keep your attention. If you do this confidently, she'll feel compelled by her curiosity to get to know you better.

Women want to notice men, but they put up screens to filter out the guys who don't stand out from the rest of the crowd. Using these tips can help you become the kind of guy that women naturally gravitate towards. But if you use the wrong approach, she might not think about you again at all.

Saturday, January 23, 2010

5 Signs Your Woman Is Abusive

There is a vast "silent" majority of men who suffer in silence in the face of emotional abusand are subjected to routine attacks on their confidence, self-esteem, pride, and identity. These same men feel shame, fear, and choose to ignore the abuse and live with it.

Have you ever wondered why it is so difficult for men who are being controlled by women with abusive personalities to break free of them and end the relationship? Here are some of the most common hooks that these emotionally abusive women use to keep their men seemingly at their mercy.

1. She threatens you with abandonment
Threatening to leave you for another man is the most common threat this type of woman will make. This statement often goes along with her constantly telling you that you're not good enough, criticizing every thing you do and demeaning you privately and publicly. Even if you were to do everything perfectly, these women are never satisfied and in their eyes, nothing you do will ever be good enough.

2. She threatens to keep your children from you if you leave her
How many times have you heard the line "If you don't do what I say, you'll never see your kids again?" Many of these women trap men into pregnancy for the sole reason of keeping you around and in their minds, "Keeping you attached. "

Although it would be tough not seeing your kids for awhile if you ended the relationship, realize that in this day and time, there are quite a few men who win full custody of their children, especially when the mother is proven dysfunctional and you're deemed the stronger and healthy parent.

3. She threatens to destroy your career
Threats to damage your reputation are often made in retaliation for the man standing up for himself or not doing things "her way." These threats are often in the form of statements like "If you don't do it, I'll call your boss and tell him you beat me."

4. She threatens to take all of your money
Statements like "You owe me" are often made along with threats of "taking you for everything you've got" if she senses that you've had enough and are ready to leave her.

5. She tells you that no other woman will put up with you
This statement is often made to instill the fear in you that no other woman will ever want you or find you attractive, which is just not true.

Believe it or not, you have the power to release yourself from these distorted, self-limiting beliefs that have been sown by this type of psychotic woman if you will begin challenging your fears with your intellect and not the same emotions that have kept you with her for far too long.

And as you begin to step out of this dysfunctional emotional way of life, she’ll increase her borderline, histrionic and manic behaviors as she frantically tries to maintain control and bully you back into place
--and she’ll be dumb founded when her tried and true control methods no longer work!

When It's Time to Break Up

Relationships will not always turn out the way people expect them to. Ending a relationship is never easy -- there’s always hurt, frustration, upset, and general unpleasantness. Even when both people know that they would be happier with someone else, it's human nature to procrastinate about difficult decisions. And while some couples try to patch things up, sometimes, the only solution left is breaking up.

There is no painless way to break up with a person. It will hurt her and it may also hurt you. When you decide to tell her that it's over, it's highly advisable to be courteous and have the decency to tell her to her face. Don't do it in a crowded place where she will feel more vulnerable than necessary; however, beware of breaking up with her in an overly remote area in case she loses control and resorts to violence.

Remember, some people don't handle rejection well. Breaking up with someone over the phone is probably the worst way to do it. Avoiding her all together by not answering phone calls, texts, e-mails, etc... may seem like the easy way out of the relationship; however, she’ll also get pretty upset and ruin your name among all the other ladies out there.

Remember that what you say can be taken a number of different ways. State your reasons for breaking up in a straightforward but thoughtful manner. Don’t just tell her you’re ending it, and then get up and leave. Keep in mind that it might take a few minutes for the news to sink in. Let her know that you are sorry that things haven't worked out, but never let there be any doubt that your relationship is over.

Saying things like “A part of me still loves you” or "Just give me some time to think it over” may ease her pain, but you'll only be giving her false hope that there's still a chance for it to work out and delaying the healing process. If you don’t want to be with her, then don’t count on anything less than a clear statement that the relationship is done. She may argue, cry or even make statements like "I don't understand why you're doing this," but be sure and stick to your guns and make sure you have rebuttals for all her potential comebacks.

Always be understanding, no matter how she reacts. Keep in mind that it could take some time for a woman, after being dumped, to be ready for friendship. Remember, just because the break up is okay with you does not mean that it is okay with her. Letting go of a bad relationship is never easy, but be true to your emotions and remember you are ending the relationship for YOU.

Monday, January 18, 2010

Men Who Stare at Cleavage

We've all been caught staring at women. It's natural and understandable to look at an attractive woman and notice her beauty; however, if you just stare at her chest and talk to her like she is an object instead of a person, don't expect to get very many dates.

Women have been complaining that men talk to their boobs instead of looking at their face for ages. Not only are breasts often the first thing men look at, they also glance at them longer than any other body part simply because they are aesthetically pleasing, regardless of the size. While you may like to think you’re slick when you try to grab a quick glance, you will always get caught.

Women can always tell when a guy "glances" at their chest, and while some may be flattered, it makes the majority of them feel uncomfortable. Some will make their disgust quite obvious, while others just ignore it because they’ve become immune to it.

Many will argue that women who wear push-up bras and low-cut blouses have no right to complain about men staring at their chests. Although some women like to wear as little clothing as possible and bring this problem on themselves by dressing provocatively, they still have the right to wear anything they want without having feeling harassed or degraded by men. Most women will admit that a man who has tendencies to seek immediate gratification at her expense is not a good choice in a mate and is generally just labeled as a pervert. They also feel that such men are obviously more concerned with their own pleasure than the comfort and happiness of the women they are intrigued with.

Guys who can't seem to stop themselves from publicly lusting over a woman's body not only make a bad first impression, but are also very unlikely to be able to stop themselves from doing "other things" at inappropriate times. So are you supposed to turn away and fight the natural instinct to look the next time you see a woman with great cleavage? The best advice would be to admire her from afar. When you're up close and personal, staring directly into a woman's eyes as you're talking to her will get you a lot farther than just staring at her chest in a rude, obvious and perverted fashion. Remember, subtlety is key.

While there is nothing wrong with "checking out" a woman's body, keep in mind that just because she's wearing something sexy doesn't mean that she wants you. A guy who can control his urges enough to check out a woman without offending her is also likely to have the patience and finesse to please that same woman in the bedroom.

Getting Caught Checking Out Other Women

So you were cold busted by your girlfriend staring at another woman. While it's completely normal for guys to glance at other women (not excessively, but certainly now & then), it becomes a problem when you actually stare at other women and forget that you're girlfriend is actually standing right next you!

Many women feel insulted when their men go out of their way to stare at other women right in front of them. Just think about how you would feel if you saw another guy undressing your woman with his eyes in front of you. When you're caught checking out another woman, don't lie about it or get defensive. That's one of the biggest mistakes men make.

Lying may be your first instinct, but women hate it when they are lied to and it will only add fuel to the fire. Acknowledge your behavior and remind your woman of how beautiful she is and how proud you are to be with her. Explain to her that just because you looked doesn't make her less attractive in your eyes.

While it is natural to look, keep in mind that getting caught repeatedly will inevitably lead to your woman's constant irritation, unnecessary arguments and accusations of you cheating, especially if you have a jealous girlfriend. For a happy relationship, and the sake of her sanity, keep your eyes planted on your own woman!

When You Get Caught Cheating

get-caught-cheatingWhen you get caught cheating, the whole world comes crashing down. Your girlfriend's head will seemingly become a whirlwind of pain and anger, and there's nothing that you can do but stand there and tell her you're sorry. No amount of apologizing can change her mind, and nothing you can say will ease her pain. In other words, a mere apology just will not suffice.

While there is no one reason why men cheat, most men that engage in these practices are either looking for something that their girlfriend is not providing, they actually desire to be with different women or they are just commitment phobic. All men know or should know that cheating is wrong; however, in troubled relationships, cheating can be an easy alternative to the burden of a relationship breakup. Make no mistake about it--when your girlfriend finds out you've been with another woman, she's going to be furious for a while. Some women will demand to know what happened, how long it's been going on, and what you've been doing with this other woman, etc... As your girlfriend rages against you and the emotions fly, you'll begin looking for ways to undo what you did. The bad news is that you can't.

One of the worst things you can do after cheating on a girl is try to blame something or someone else. In a situation like this, she's concerned with her own emotions, and the last thing she wants to hear about is how "badly" you feel. So avoid telling her stuff like "I feel terrible that this happened". If you truly love and care about your girlfriend, you should feel some pain and guilt. When she is sufficiently calm, make a heartfelt, genuine apology for cheating on her. Take responsibility for cheating on her and don't defer the blame onto your lover, how much you had to drink, or whatever. When you agree with her that this is definitely your own fault, her anger can finally start draining away; however, don't think that just a couple of days will be enough for her to get over what you did.

Some women will cheat on you in retaliation ( with a guy who's hotter than you) or just choose not to forgive you and move on. Even if you're lucky enough to have a a girlfriend who is truly forgiving, loving and understanding --the relationship will change forever. Make no mistake about it: cheating automatically kills the trust that your lady had for you. Her allegiance and dedication to you will drop immediately, and even if she does not state it verbally, you'll see the change in her demeanor when she's around you. She will always have trust issues with you from that moment, and although she may try to forget what you did, she will always be hurt.

Keep in mind that although she may forgive and forget, your girlfriend's family and friends will always have a longer memory than she does and will still hate you long after she forgave you. You also have to deal with the possibility of the fling that you hooked up with wanting to be your main squeeze and possibly causing even more problems for your already damaged relationship.

Sunday, January 17, 2010

8 Signs of a Bad Relationship

Many failed relationships occur because the person jumped in too fast and wanted too much too quickly, and failed to spot red flags early on. Every relationship has its ups and downs. But if there are only downs, you are probably stuck in a bad relationship with the wrong woman. Here are some of the most obvious signs of a bad relationship:

1. You no longer have strong feelings about her. You've stopped feeling affectionate towards her and the relationship has become more of a duty that you have to carry out.

2. You’re being emotionally abused. She makes you feel worthless by using cruel words, rude remarks and a controlling attitude.

3. Sex with her feels like an obligation.

4. You're irritated by her voice and you can't wait to get off the phone with her.

5. She's a drama queen. You have a feeling of continuous frustration about the relationship and feel that only her needs are being met.

6. You have deep resentments toward her and you’re finding more reasons to spend time away from her.

7. You’ve put extreme distance and/or totally cut off close relationships you used to have with your friends and family.

8. You’ve changed your values and beliefs to accommodate her and become who she wants you to be.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Dealing With Her Guy Friend

So what do you do if you meet a girl, start dating her, and find out that her best friend is a guy? First off, you have to realize that it's not unusual for men and women to be friends and whether he's gay, a former boyfriend or a sucker stuck in the dreaded FRIENDZONE, chances are they've known each other for a long time and have a tight bond. But in order to successfully deal with this kind of situation, you have to be able to figure out whether or not her guy friend secretly wants to get with her, or is he indeed just a friend.

If her best friend is a guy, it could cause problems for your relationship because there will always be another guy with whom she's emotionally intimate. If they've known each other for a long time, she'll naturally feel comfortable hugging him and more than likely has confided in him a number of times on some very personal issues. He will be there for her when you're not and can offer her insight into your behaviors, especially when the two of you are having an argument. Because of this, you need to gradually phase him out and become her "go-to guy," the first person she thinks to call whenever she has good or bad news.

As you determine whether or not her male best friend poses a threat, you need to find out more about their history. Offer to meet the guy in order to get a feel for what his true intentions are. Doing this will allow you to determine whether he's a threat to your relationship or not by doing simple things like inquiring whether or not they were ever more than just friends, watching for flirting between the two, and gaining insight into his relationship history. Gathering this information about him will allow you to deal with the situation accordingly.

Trust is key in every relationship, and the worst thing you can do is express unfounded jealousy and possessiveness because it makes you seem insecure and could drive her away for good. However, if your woman insists on always wanting to go over to her guy friend's house to hang out instead of spending quality time with you, buying him gifts, receiving mysterious phone calls from him, sending secret text messages and getting defensive whenever you mention the behaviors, there's probably more to it than just friendship and you have a reason to feel uncomfortable.

If she is really committed to you, then she should respect you enough to set some boundaries with her male friend, no matter how long she's known him. Although you can't make a woman do anything, you don't have to sit there and be a sucker. If she refuses to respect your feelings, it may be time to move on.

Monday, January 11, 2010

Why Women Want What's Off Limits

Have you ever wondered why it's so hard to get women to give you the time of day when you're single, but once you're in a great relationship with a good woman, you suddenly get an abnormally high number of compliments, giggles and increased attention from attractive women?

It's no secret that single women are drawn to a man in a relationship. It’s fascinating, but also very frustrating and unfair for the newly tied-down man. After hearing the countless tired pick-up lines and being played too many times by all the wrong, commitment phobic single men, many women see taken men as being "safe" and having desirable qualities, namely, being successful, intelligent and charming. Women love a challenge--and since taken men are tougher to get, luring you away from your good relationship gives them bragging rights.

Because an attached man has demonstrated his ability to commit, in some ways his qualities have already been ‘pre-screened' by other women. The simple fact that you make the woman on your arm happy attracts the buzz of many other women and makes them all want to steal you away from her.

Another reason why some women can't just let a taken man go is because just like a lot of men, many women crave sex. As a result, when some women meet a man that they have an undeniable sexual attraction to, they rush forward and pounce without thinking about the repercussions. Remember, women want what other women have, and the more out of reach you are, the more appealing you are to them.

Although it may seem that your success with one woman has made you successful with all women, if you're lucky enough to find a good woman who wants to be by your side, ruining a good relationship and throwing it all away for one night of pleasure with a woman who showed no interest when you were still on the market isn't very smart.

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Talking About Your Ex With Your Dates

Your first conversation on a date with a new woman should be fun and intriguing, not consumed with emotional baggage and especially not discussions about your ex.

Women view men that can't stop talking about their ex non-stop as having unresolved frustrations and pent-up bitterness. Most men who talk about their ex do so because they're still trying to analyze what led to the breakup and have problems rebuilding when a relationship ends. By constantly talking about your ex to a new woman, she may see you as just trying to make yourself appear as the victim or the "wronged party" With this state of mind, a man is more likely to steer the conversation with a new woman into more of a comparison checklist, i.e., "my ex wanted me to take her out to expensive restaurants every night--what do you think of that?"

When meeting new women, think about how to focus on what potentially good relationships you could have with them instead of boring your dates with stories of your ex. Although women appreciate a man who can genuinely show his emotions, remember--constantly talking about your ex-partners and messy breakups can make a very bad first impression and run her off in a hurry!

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Turning Women Off With Bad Breath

Have you ever felt like you have the looks and all the right moves, but for some reason, when you speak to women, they just keep turning their head and moving away from you? Although the right words may be coming out of your mouth, bad breath may be what's turning the ladies off.

A big part of keeping yourself up is taking care of your oral hygiene. Bad breath is one of the biggest turnoffs you can display to the opposite sex. Bad breath is mainly caused by a buildup of odor-causing bacteria gorging and producing waste in your mouth. The No. 1 thing you can do to ensure that your breath is as sweet as your personality is to keep up a diligent oral regimen, to include brushing your teeth, gums and your tongue at least twice a day along with adding flossing and the use of mouthwash to your daily routine to protect your teeth and give your mouth a minty fresh smell. You may even invest in a mini toothbrush and toothpaste along with sugarless gum and mints to keep with you on the go, especially if you're meeting someone important after a meal. Also, going to the dentist twice a year for a routine cleaning and checkup is an important step to maintaining fresh breath.

Although it’s something that everyone will deal with from time to time, bad breath can be hugely embarrassing. Ensure that you always have fresh breath and watch high quality women get closer and closer to you!

Saturday, January 2, 2010

Women Who Let Themselves Go

All men want a woman who takes care of herself - exercises, eats reasonably healthy, and has some respect for her body.
Although most women care immensely about how they present themselves, there are some out there who don't, i.e., let their finger nails get and stay dirty, avoid shaving anywhere, display unkempt hair, have bad breath, foul odor from their intimate areas, etc..) Those traits are not what men look for in women.

Although there could be a number of reasons why a woman would let herself go, neglect her hygiene and display obvious body turnoffs, you don't have the time or the psychology degree to figure out all the "whys."

If you're interested in staying with a woman who constantly neglects herself, you can try mentioning in passing that there seems to be something amiss, but realize that you're going to be facing a recurring and uphill battle if you ever want her to change. Remember, a woman who loves herself will never neglect her personal health and hygiene.