Monday, May 11, 2009

Impressing Her Mom

In the early stages of a relationship there are few people, if anyone, that you need to worry about impressing more than her mother. When push comes to shove, her mother doesn't care about the amount of gifts, flowers or compliments you have to offer--your girlfriend's mom is really only concerned with how you treat her daughter.

The best way to impress your girlfriend’s mother is to act natural. Be yourself. There is nothing worse than trying to hard to be someone you are not and then totally “blowing it” and having to explain yourself later. Moms have X-ray vision, especially when it comes to telling whether a man is being fake and if they don’t like you, you’re not going to get very far.

On the other hand, “being yourself” does not mean being rude and obnoxious and looking unkempt. If you show up looking unshaven and dressed like you're jobless, chances are that her mother will not be impressed and may even become upset and disappointed about your lack of etiquette. Moms don’t want their daughters dating losers, so show her you’re not one. Be a gentleman, dress accordingly when you’re in her presence, leave your faded jeans and holey t-shirts at home and throw on something a little more sophisticated. Simple and classy, bringing her mother flowers is also a sophisticated and gentlemanly way to get in her good graces.

Early on, her mom will likely try to determine whether or not you’re marriage material or just a short-term fling. When you first meet her, she’s probably going to ask you about where you went to school and what you do for a living so she can determine whether or not her daughter's possible future mate has his life together.

Take this time to give her a mini-resume, tell her positive things about yourself, your goals and your career and engage in interesting conversation with her. You can also ask her questions about her family and careers without being too intrusive. Spend a few minutes exchanging pleasantries with her mom; in fact, it will do wonders for your relationship -- with both mother and daughter. Who knows, she may drop some hints that could help you win her daughter over.

Remember, good manners are a must when you’re in her mother's company, and you surely know it’s good to be extra affectionate and supportive of your partner when her mom is around. Let her mom know how much you appreciate her daughter all the time and never disrespect your girlfriend in front of her mother and definitely not during the early stages of your relationship. Teasing your woman down the road in a friendly manner can be acceptable, especially if you've built a good rapport with the mother. But at first, the mother may be inclined to think that you might cross the line and do worse things.

Every mother prays for the happiness of her daughter, and hopes that she will have a better life than her own. So make her dreams come true by being extra affectionate and supportive of your partner when her mom is around along with all of the other little things to show her mom what a great guy you are.

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